i have sooooo not been working on any arty thing in my studio lately. to be perfectly honest, i’ve cut so wayyyy back on my artmaking hours, they are nearly non-existent. when the reality of this sinks in, i begin to get a feeling of near hysteria and panic, feeling as if i am once again embarking on another decade of leaving the artistic life behind, even though in reality, i know that nothing could be further from the truth.
no, the truth is, what i have been busy creating is my life. a rich one, outside the studio walls that lately includes a part-time (remedial reading) teaching job, nights of real-live-actual sleep that usually spans 8 hours or more, more quality time with my children and family, more time spent taking better care of myself, a-just-returned-from-women’s-retreat with the women at wellspring covenant church——where i got my toes wet giving a brief how-to workshop on making plaster vessels——and being a part of a dynamic lead team of women who planned the retreat from start to finish and planning for (next week), an upcoming trip to washington d.c. and chicago!!!
i think what i fear during this new season is that i won’t matter to you if i stop making art. that you will forget me and i will cease to connect with you. that i will lose my place in the tribe of artists i have finally found and to whom i belong, and that i will wander so far from my art that i will fail to ever pick up my artlife again and that it will be lost to me forever...that i won’t be able to find my way back home (even though i know in my heart of hearts that Jesus is always with me and that He guides me to the Father——my ultimate home——with unfailing faithfulness).
